You and Beauregard at The Dead Salamander

Beauregard, a longtime friend, is passing through the area and invites you to join him at The Dead Salamander. The fact that he orders a jolt of whiskey with his adult mocha surprises you a little even though his recent Facebook posts have spoken of him and his co-workers enjoying the house specials at a nearby bar. 

The conversation is friendly enough; but as you visit you sense he is waiting for something. More than once he makes a point of saying how good his coffee is. 

Eventually he sighs contentedly and says, “I’m so glad I’ve shed all that (*#*#*) legalistic (#*#*)” Then, with a serious face he adds, “I suppose that offends you.”

You sit back, take another satisfied slurp of your mocha. 

“Beauregard, it has nothing to do with me. I know you’ve had some bad experiences at your church. I’m sorry you think alcohol and cussing are what freedom’s all about. Does it bother you that I still think those are things Jesus doesn’t want in my life?”

“Actually, yeah, it does bug me a little.”

“In what way?”

“You're still caught up in that Fundamentalist mindset. Being a Christian is about love. It’s not about giving up a bunch of stuff and making everybody miserable to make Jesus happy. He drank wine and he used some pretty strong language…And don’t give me that business about it being grape juice.”

You smile. 

“No, I won’t give you that business. But I will give you this business. When Jesus talked about people being damned he was not throwing around a cuss word; and when he talked about being sober he seemed to think it was important. How often do you get drunk?”

“Only on…” he starts to say. His lips tighten for a moment. “It’s not really any of your business, you know.”

“You’re right. But as I recall you brought the subject up.”



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