Five Reality Checks for the Blessing Place

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If you have a heart for the young man you take to The Blessing Place (and, I would assume you do or you wouldn’t be going there), you need to know your heart can get in the way of wisdom. In so doing you may mislead your friend and raise expectations which, when unfulfilled, can embitter him. Be alert, therefore, to this truth:

YOU CANNOT ALWAYS BE THERE FOR HIM !

So, don’t say you will be.

Help him understand your role in his life is to launch him, not to possess him. Jonathan came close to this mistake when he blessed David.

In our era where many young men have been deprived of a father figure or have had a father who reduced the role to an empty shell, your blessing can make you seem heroic in their sight. (Yes, you…heroic. Even if you don’t know a tennis field from a football court.)

Surely, it would be wonderful if you could become best buds forever; but there are five important reality checks.

First: You will not live forever.

Second: You will both move. Time, geography, and lifestyle priorities take their toll. 

Third: God actually has other people he intends to bring into his life to bless him and God has other people he intends to bring into your life to bless. This happens even on a father/son level. Each of our four boys has a list of other men who have built things into their life experience which I could never have done.

That suggests the fourth reality check: You are not all knowing, and all-gifted.

Fifth: You are capable of mistakes. I don’t suggest making any on purpose. (If you’re like me you won’t have to worry about that.) At The Blessing Place, you might want to forewarn them about your fallibility and encourage them to build a team of mentors. I am suspicious of men who give the impression of always having it all together. Their self-praise (to the glory of God, of course) can discourage people who already have a painful awareness of their own fallibility.  

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