If You're Going to Sneeze!

What do Kindergarteners and First Graders remember? Well, maybe stories.

Many years ago I was asked to read a story to a group of these little folks at the Cortland Christian Academy. I selected one of the books my own boys had enjoyed. Several years later I re-encountered one of those children. He was being graduated high school. Once we recollected when our paths had crossed he said, “Oh yes! You’re the man who read a story about an elephant when I was in Kindergarten.”

The story he remembered was Patricia Thomas’ 1971 classic (in my estimation), “Stand Back!” Said the Elephant. “I’m Going to Sneeze.” Illustrated by Wallace Tripp.

It is a pachydermic fantasy with breathtakingly delightful anxiety. It invites the reader to use his voice creatively, and it draws the listener in with anticipation. It builds suspense through the common phenomenon of an approaching sneeze raised to an art form. It bursts with laughter as it unpacks irony at its funniest. From bees' knees to a zebra's stripes it is a frolicking romp through absurd panic, cool observation and a delightful catch-twenty-two conclusion.

Note: Cortland Christian Academy is a ministry of Bible Baptist Church of Cortland, NY.